I’m reporting live from the 6th visit to my fridge today.
Since I’ve been home and not working at the moment, it’s been a challenge to navigate through each day. Initially I expected to be making a lot more art, because there’s nothing but time now. Before we were on lockdown, or “quarantine” if you prefer, the lack of time seemed like the main obstacle to my ability to produce more work consistently. However, personally I’ve found myself filling my days with lots of other things. To be fair, I have made a few pieces in the last month and a half, but I could’ve made more. Surprisingly I don’t really feel bad about it. The way that it’s been shaking out for me is that it’s nice to make art whenever I want, not to do a whole bunch of it. The real unfortunate part about the state of things is that we don’t have more time just for the hell of it. The extra time comes at the cost of being in a state of constant anxiety and survivor mode. Everywhere we turn there are messages of death, sickness and loss. So though at first glance it sounds like this is the best time to take advantage of the extra time that I have and create more than I ever have, most days it’s difficult to find the right headspace!
Even still, I have been able to be creative in an informal way. My partner has a six year old daughter who is always seconds away from a creative idea, which means that I’m always seconds away from creating it with her. I have to say, it keeps me on my toes! It’s also been an exercise in simply “doing.” My biggest challenge over the last two plus years is detaching myself from certain expectations for my artwork or the act of making artwork, but hanging out with a six year old is teaching me to let go of some of that. With her there are new creative problems to solve all the time, and there’s no concern about how it looks or how long it takes. It’s the most freeing thing for me right now, and it has made it easier to have the same approach to my own work at the moment. There are no series that I’m interested in working on right now, no upcoming shows, no deadlines, and no restraints. Right now I’m making whatever comes to mind or pulling old ideas that I never executed, and sharing them. That’s it.
For however long I have left in this particular phase of life, I’m going to continue to make whatever I want whenever I want and just see how I feel. Maybe it’s necessary to help push myself forward? I have to admit that working with a young child is in some way helping me get in touch with the concept of “art for art’s sake,” which has been so difficult for me to do for years. I hope that I can find a way to keep it up!
As always, I would love to hear your thoughts. How have you been using your time? Do you find yourself creating more or less often? Are you creating alone or with someone else?